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I am a step-mother of a wonderful, sweet 13 yr old. We just finished a second time in court trying to get custody,just primary custody. Her mother is raising her and she is not getting the proper care that she needs or deserves.I understand that there are much worse cases than this one, but each case has their own situations.My step-daughter will drop out of school in just 3 years at age 16, get pregnant, and then latch onto a man to man to "take care" of her for the rest of her life. That is how she is being raised. Her mother does that, her sisters, aunt, and cousins all do the samething. She doesn't know any differnt.We only have her 6 days amonth and half of the summer, that is not enough time to show her the "right" way. Her mother is a acholic and uses drugs. Her aunt takes my step-daughter on drug runs...taking her out of school. She isn't doing well in school at all, has a really hard time with school. There were several stipulations that her mother was to follow, and my husband had the proof that she wasn't following them. The judge told both my husband and her mother that the court order is only a guide-line, and that since my step-daughter isn't in any trouble with the law, than she much be doing ok. Although she isn't adjusting to school and she doesn't have the support at home that she needs. The worse part is the judge on this case, doesn't even have any children of his own and even omitted in court that "he has no idea how a 13 yr old acts or what she would need". What the heck is he a judge in family law. She is failing in school, doesn't get the medical or dental care that she needs. My step-daughter had 6 cavities within a 4 month period. That is unheard of. The judge said that it must be another medical condition. Really! Are you seriouse?
I was hoping you may have some ideas on how we can change this. The laws need to be changed so judges have to look at the whole picture and stand by what it is suppose to be all about..."the best interest for the child". Is it really the best interest for the child to fail, to not get proper medical attention. My step-daughter has had a problem swallowing and then ends up vomiting.Her mother is fully aware of this, but is ok with it. Doesn't take her to the doctor to see what the problem is. My step-daughter has needed braces for the past 3 yrs where she has 2 teeth coming in at the same place, or teeth needs to be taken care of to make room. Her mother uses the money that my husband gives to my step-daughter and uses to buy beer instead of clothes, school supplies, dental care or anything else that she may need. The sad thing is, my step-daughter has full medical and dental insurance, so there isn't any reason why this is not getting taken care of. My step-daughter was so sick and couldn't breath, tried to wake her mother up & couldn't becuase her mother was passed out from drinking. Is that the best interest for the child. In our home, there isn't any drinking or drug use and I have a one year old that is the love of my life. I so make sure he has everything and then more that he could ever want to need. He comes first, my step-daughter doesn't have that same type of love from her mother.
Please help me! I need to find out a way to get some laws passed that first family judges should at least have a family, that court orders should not be guide lines, and if you break the court order in anyway, then you are held accountable for those actions. My husband is slowly getting run out of my step-daughters life. Just like her mother did to her 2 older sisters. They haven't seen their father in 17 years because their mother said they couldn't, eventhough she had joint custody with their father. She kept lieing to their dad and would never tell him where his girls were. This isn't right.
If this was a mother, this would never of happened.The father should have just as much right as the mothers do. Please guide me in a direction to help with these issues. Not only for my husband and step-daughter, but everyother man who is in the same situation...or woman if the case is the same. There were women on your show who need the same help.
Thank you,
Jackie