Melissa McCarthy. Plus, Could You Forgive Someone Who Almost Killed You? -- The Turkey Lady’s Story
Anderson sits down with “Bridesmaids” and “Mike and Molly” star Melissa McCarthy for a personal interview, discussing everything from her eccentric rituals with her husband to being a mother of two young girls, her rise to fame and how she maintains such a positive body image in the body-conscious world of Hollywood. Plus, tune in to see what gift Melissa gives to Anderson!
Then, could you forgive someone who almost killed you? Anderson speaks with the woman behind the headline, Victoria Ruvolo, who was a victim of a life-changing random act of violence that left her in a coma for a month, when a group of teenagers threw a frozen turkey out of a moving car and hit her in 2004. Ruvolo, who now has three titanium plates in her face, discusses forgiveness with Anderson.
Comments
God bless that lady that forgave.It really takes a special
person to do that. I hope I'm never in that place. I would
hope God would make me strong enough to forgive if anything
unpleant should happen.
This is a great article I am sharing....
Why Forgiveness is Over Rated
The F-Word. It’s the answer. The key to enlightenment. A necessary part of becoming a better person. According to these books, if we don’t forgive, we eventually turn into balls of rage and seething anger, trapped in a life of inner turmoil and destined to self-implode in a spiral of selfishness and stubborn self-destruction.
Well, I should probably get moving on all that, because: I Don’t Do Forgiveness. Well, I do do forgiveness, but only for the right people. The people who take responsibility for their actions, the people who will take action to make amends, even if it means facing some tough stuff within themselves. Even then, there is a ‘forgiveness line’. Once someone crosses that, there’s no going back.
Emotionally abusive: demeaning remarks about someone’s height/weight/ethnic background, demeaning remarks about someone’s abilities, manipulation and coercion.
Physically abusive: hitting, slapping, pinching, kicking, hair pulling, dragging, shaking. Or, to rephrase it, touching in any way that isn’t affectionate or for someone’s protection.
Sexually abusive: inappropriate hugging, kissing or touching, inappropriate comments, violation of someone’s privacy.
(Of course, there are many more subtle forms of abuse but the above is a basic list.)
None of these behaviors are acceptable to me. And that’s why I don’t buy the ‘forgiveness for all’ approach. There are some people I just don’t want to forgive.
What Forgiveness Is
Forgiveness is saying ‘Hey, you did something, I was wronged. But it’s ok. I don’t hold you responsible for your actions now, and I don’t feel upset about it anymore.’ Every adult is responsible for their actions. Forgiveness only comes when they have shown that they recognized their actions were wrong and have taken steps to make amends.
Sometimes, Forgiveness Is Dangerous. Why?
Because it’s a way of letting ourselves pretend that things weren’t really so bad, that we didn’t really feel that hurt, or that scared or that angry. Here’s the thing: undeserved forgiveness is not only cruel to you, it’s cruel to the perpetrator as well. By forgiving, we are condoning their actions, saying it’s OK for them to behave that way. If we don’t forgive, if we raise our standards and expect more in retribution; that affects their standards too.
The Bottom Line: Forgiveness has to be earned and it’s totally OK not to forgive someone. There is no ‘should’ – you can choose to forgive or not, whoever is concerned. There is such a thing as unforgivable. Pretending there isn’t is doing ourselves a disservice.
A Few Words From My Pit Of Seething Self-Destruction… I’m not saying don’t forgive anyone ever. There are very, very few people I have chosen not to forgive in my life. These decisions have been deeply considered and very difficult. However, contrary to popular belief, I’m not dwelling on the decision every day, listening to heavy metal, painting my walls black and spouting rage-filled epithets concerning said people at anyone who will listen.
In some ways, I’ve achieved what those self-help writers are talking about – I’ve let go of the bad stuff and I feel good about that. It’s just that instead of forgiving, I chose not to forgive. I’ve moved on with my life, they’ve moved on with theirs… we’re just not doing it together. And I’m a stronger person for that.
THREE LARGE ADOLECENT'S BEAT ME TO THE GROUND WITH 40 OUNCE BALL PEAN HAMMER'S WHILE I WAS OUT WALKING FOR LOWER BACK THERAPY FROM INJURY INITIALLY FROM A 90' FALL FROM A RAPPELLING TOWER WHILE IN RECON MARINE'S,CAUSING 21 YEAR'S AGO A TRAUMATTIC BRAIN INJURY, LOSS OF LEFT EYE. WENT THRU 4 RECONSTRUCTIVE SURGURY'S IN A 2 YEAR PERIOD. WENT BACK TO WORK BUT NEVER CONVICTED THEM BECAUSE AS GOD HAS FORGIVEN ME FOR MY SIN'S I SHOWED COMPASSION AND DID NOT PRESS CHARGE'S. FORGIVING THEM FOR THEY KNEW NOT WHAT THEY WERE DOING. IN ADDITTION TO THE FACT THEY WOULD PROBABLY ONLY GET 6 MONTH BOOT CAMP. I FOLLOWED THEM THRU THE CRIME VICTUM INVESTIGATION UNIT FOR MANY YEAR'S AND FOUND THEY CONTINUED ON WITH 2 MORE I'M AWARE OF, 1 MALE AND 1 FEMALE. THEN LOST INTEREST BUT ONLY PRAY AT THAT SOME POINT THEY WERE STOPPED AND SOMEHOW REHABILITADED & LIVED PRODUCTIVE LIVE'S SINCE THEN. I DON'T KNOW?
I Think Victoria did the right thing and i hope the teenager learn from hos mistake.Best of luck to u Victoria
Victoria
Thank You! You are truly a Godly example to follow - may God Bless You and your speaking engagements.
Sincerely, Janet
Is it possible to get tapes of your shows/interviews ?
I think Victoria did the right thing for herself & the teeneger . Teens just don't THINK of the consequences . It doesn't give them an excuse for their behavior but to have sent him to prison would not have helped him or Victoria.
I had quite a different experience. I wa***** by a car while riding my bicycle on October 3, 2008. It was a hit and run. Seconds before the impact, I had taken some photos of some hot air balloons landing in the area, as the Albuquerque Balloon Fiesta was in progress. At the scene, as I laid there across the ditch bleeding, I told the police it was a white car, with a woman driving it. The police never found the car. I was very upset that someone would leave me, possibly dying, in a ditch, and not stop. Not only that, the photo showed there were 2 people in the car! I was pretty sure that the guilty party likely lived in the neighborhood, as the accident happend on a dirt road, not the kind of road people would be traveling through to go somewhere. My wife and I made at least 30 trips down that road over the next two months. I even waited at the end of that road the next week at the same time the accident occured, thinking I might catch the perpetrator, if she was on some kind of schedule. After two months with no luck from myself or the police, one morning, at around 3:00 am, I got the idea of using Google Earth's street level view. I moved the camera down the street, and rotated it and found the car! I took the Google Earth image to the police station, and the police got a search warrant based on the evidence I collected. The police found the car in the garage, the licence plate that was on the front of the car when it hit me was in the trunk. The vehicle had been reregistered with Iowa plates. The police collected more evidence, and found the lady had stayed across town at a hotel for 3 days after the accident. At that point, she drove the car to Iowa, where she reregistered it, even though the New Mexico plate was good for another year, and obtained an Iowa drivers license. Over the next two months, the car was religiously kept in the garage. So she went to great lengths to hide her guilt. The trial came up, and the attorney general of the state of New Mexico dropped the ball, and failed to summons anyone to court, including myself, so the judge dismissed the case. The arresting officer was furious at this, so she refiled the case in magistrate court. The day before the second trial was to take place, the prosecuting attorney for the state called me and said the previous judge had set a statue of limitations after the first trial, and that statute had passed. So the woman was getting off scott free. I still to this day, even though I was not seriously injured, luckily, have no closure about the incident, as this was an older woman, and a passenger, (who I now believe was her young niece), who made the decision to leave me there, not knowing what condition I was in after bouncing off the windshield of their car, and landing on the opposite side of a 3 foot wide ditch, not being able to get up. I did file a civil suit and got her insurance company to pay for my ambulance ride, and hospital stay, after about a 2 year fight. The person that hit me was in her 50's, had a previous DWI, and took her drink of orange juice and vodka with her to be questioned - this is all on the police report. I can only hope the next person she hits is not seriously injured. I would just like the lady to admit her guilt, and say she was sorry, before I can find closure.
I meant maximum age limit (I was nervous)
I just did a college paper about raising the minimum age limit for juveniles from 17 in most states and younger in some to 22. The reasons are exactly what the lady was talking about. Teens do not have rationalization. Locking them up just creates a criminal who comes out worse. I wanted to know what happened to the teen? Did he learn from his second chance? Is he in school and maybe paying it forward?
On the 22ed of dec.in 1995 i was 17teen yrs old & in my last year of high school. My boyfriend at the time was a truck in front of me!! I was in my own truck & my dog was with me i was on my way home & in the middle of the intersection waiting to cross to the far left lane!! ALL i remember is going to shift into 2ed gear & looking back I was T-boned on the passer side.I woke up in the micu 2,months later!! I found out that I broke my neck & now I'm parlayed from the chest down I can move my arms but not my fingers...I guy who hit me had no DL & he went back to his country...I for gave that guy long ago!!! Because I had to keep moving on.. This month will be 16yrs that I have been a quidripleagic..
I love John Edward. I miss his show. I lost my dad two years ago in December, I was with him in the hospital when he passed and he was not conscious. I kept talking to him for hours and finally told him it was ok to go if he had to, we would be ok and we loved him, did he hear me? I miss him so much! It would really make me more at peace if I knew he heard me. I think he did. Thank you for all you do for people it makes a difference. Marlene Cervantes (530) 533-8080
I just turned on the TV and your show was on, little after 8:00,
you touch the lady's face. " it is hard."
she mentioned that she has a lot of pain.
any time there is pain,there is muscles s-p-a-s-m.
her face is hard to touch means there is muscles in spasm and also d/t venous returns blocked or we say that the Chi stop flowing.
her condition really need to relax the muscle on the neck, shoulder and back.
correct the above can also heal her upper teeth problem.
it only take about 30 minutes to restore the Chi flows and her face will be soft again. pain no more.
I saw the show on Thursday about the bad plastic surgery - very informative Anderson is a delightful host and a pleasure to watch and listen to - he seems to have so much compassion - glad I was able to see the show!
I love you Anderson becos you bringout the most controversial topics. From what I saw of the socalled weapon,I don't think any child can die from the use of that. People never like to take responsibility for their actions. How can college graduates not know when to stop beating their child? Are they morons? There are crazy people who do horrible things and then look for someone to blame. Everyone is endowed with some type of thinking faculty and should know what is right or wrong. Sometimes I feel so disgusted with the hypocrisy I see on air ,like the lady who keeps crying that I want to puke. Lets get real America.