'How My Husband Became My Wife' Plus, 'The Latest Theory on Why Men Cheat'
Ted and Rene were happily married for eight years and lived a conventional life with their two children, until a severe bee sting reaction revealed that Ted had a rare genetic condition, ultimately leading him to have gender reassignment surgery. Now living as Chloe, this couple must redefine what it means to be a family. Anderson explores how this has affected the couple's intimacy, and the impact it has had on their sons.
Then, Anderson is joined by a panel of women for a heated conversation on why men cheat. Bethany St. James, a legal prostitute and blogger for The Huffington Post, joins the conversation. St. James recently wrote a story that garnered attention for blaming the lack of intimacy in relationships for pushing men to cheat. Also included in the conversation, a former mistress turned infidelity expert, Sarah Symonds, and co-host of "Loveline" Simone Bienne, plus two women who've had relationships destroyed because of infidelity.
Start the conversation early: Why do think people cheat on their spouses? Also, what would you do if your spouse told you he or she wanted gender reassignment surgery?
Comments
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I have been with my husband for eight years married for two, and he has never cheated. Bethany's thinking about what she does is unbelievable!! If she is really enrolled in school to become a sex therapist, i better make sure i don't ever need her therapy!! She is dillusional about what she does, and this worry's me about our future.
I agree with Bethany, you maybe luck to have a good wife or partner that listen to you, I don't like to talk to my wife at all, she can find something wrong with anything you say, and she have to be right all the time or your life will be in hell, sex is when she wants as she want it, when she is at home I am unhappy and not my self and usually in another room, but we have to kids and I just don't want to leave because of them, we both try to kinda put a show when they are around. it is very difficult, the problem she thinks that she is a very nice person and good company.
The reason why Men (and women) cheat is because this world has become a disposable world! Also our genetics are animal. We belong to the animal kingdom and in most of the animal world Monogamy is NOT the norm. We try and try but still humans fail at Monogamy. Because we ARE ANIMALS. It has nothing to do with what a person is not giving to another. If you believe it is ONLY men, you are very very wrong! Women do it more then men do... we just hide it better. From experience as a person whom has worked in the adult sex industry can tell you first hand, I agree with Madame Bethany St. James. Most of the clients I have had were more interested in just having someone to talk to, shop with, golf with, have dinner with, and spend time with (women included here). Sex really wasn't what most wanted. They were looking for companionship outside their partnership and yes I felt more like a therapist then anything. I believe that Madame Bethany did not get a fair shake at all and that maybe a one on one would have been better. Those women on the show were angry from the get go and really did not want to hear the reality that Madame Bethany was so willing to speak of. I believe the panel wasn't fair. What about the "Cheater"? All I saw was a bunch of women!!!! Y for one was very disappointed in the show when I was watching it.
I thought the show was a all a lie to TRY to help women whose husbands have cheated. I've been on both sides. When I woke up to my husband's affair and got passed the part about being lied to I realized that ALL ALONG he had wanted me as badly as he wanted her and I had been pushing him away for years. Never, ever again will I discount how important physical intimacy and playfulness is to men in a LOVING relationship. They genuinely feel UNloved when women reject physical intimacy over and over again. They know how desperately they want you and are totally baffled that you don't feel the same way and eventually they give up and seek it somewhere else. This is obviously not the reason for all affairs, but it's a pretty big one. My current marriage is as strong as my first one should have been because I have a whole different appreciation for physical intimacy.
And to Megan it was refreshing to hear from someone with some common sense and integrity.
I just have one question "Why does a man ask a woman to marry him in the first place. As soon as you are married it is the woman's duty to keep the house clean, do the laundry, cook, raise the children, and work a full time job,and cater to her husband's and children's every whim. Make sure all holidays and birthdays and vacations are great, shop for everyones clothes and all the groceries and just make sure every damn detail in their lives is taken care of. Mean while the husbands and kids rarely show and gratitude or appreciation. And all the while I did this I kept in shape (5'4" 117lbs). I loved and complimented my husband, listened to his problems, gave him backrubs and even bought myself sexy lingerie. And you know what he cheated me since day one and I didn't find out untill we had been married 28 years. I think every woman out there should just be a prostitute. Men don't want to be husbands, dads or your best friends. So you might as well just #@$#@ for money. Smart girls those prostitutes are they aren't stuck with all the drudgery of marriage or a jerk of a husband.
Husband's will cheat because marriage is complicated & out dated. If you want to fall out of love then get married and have kid's. Prostitute's are uncomplicated sexual outlet's for men and they have been around forever. If you don't want your husband to cheat you better be game for any kind of sex at anytime of the day without complaint. And there is still a chance he will go live out some fantasy with someone anyway. At least prostitute's don't try to steal your husband, so be thankful for that! Even good men cheat because some day's the penis rule's!
Hi, everyone on facebook!
Remarks about the show today with Anderson Cooper! I Have to say that this was one off the worst show not because it the Show but because it was only one sided!
Please! Men are Men they do what they want, when they want, Where they want,and how they want! The Panel were women! If men were to be true to themselves it would be to shocking for women to handel! Just b
e thankful Of the hidden Ladies!
I was a Minister for 17 years Mental Health counslor for 30 years! I have heard it all form! My wife: don't understantd me, God she is just a bitch and won't listen, I try to talk but can't get a word in edgewise, She don't know how to kiss, she hates my body, she can't do oral, she can't cause the kid's might hear, she is to busy, she is in to much pain with a headache, I'm on my period, I don't like the way you touch me, I don't Like your hands there to rough, I don't like anything to do with kissing just do it down there, Your just a pig, I won't do it tonight cause i caught you looking at someone eles on TV show, I'm punishing you cause i can, Don't touch my boobs, go choke the chicken cause i'm through with you,!
The Husband then goes to another female: who say's wow your hot!, Love to do ya, come here big boy, I like what your doing to my hair, touch me again, wow that was a hot kiss i feel it hot, i like to do it eveyday, play with my boobs i love it, yes yes your the man, where eles can we do it, how often you want it baby, what i got is your's anytime, wow your big (even if he is small), god i love that, Kiss me everywhere use your tougne, I love playing games with you,! All Positive statements!
I have and this is not Joke ladies counslored men on many occations Praying with them talking with them Listening to there stories.
Today Enotion was talked about But, one thing was missing the MEN!
Too Many men have told me I even Hold men and kiss them because i can never get that at home with my wife! Not true about all Men! But Please Women Look at the emothions your giveing out cause it could very well lead to divorce, mistress, or him leaving you cause your just cold!
Dennis signing out!
I had to write as i have been with so many married men who fit the emotional profile!
I am seriously disgusted by the display I just saw on this show. First of all, accepting that Anderson used to be a respectable journalist and is now fodder for the daytime masses is difficult enough, but to see such an egregious display of small-minded thought and basic bullying of people who differ in view is abominable. Anderson prodded the audience members whose own fear and insecurity prevented them from even digesting the points-of-view of the women on the stage who said things that questioned the very essence of how they understand the world. Isn't that what dialogue, hearing other opinions, individual thought and learning new things is all about? Challenging the readily accepted preconceived notions that often fit in a box? If you choose to disagree, fine, but everyone is entitled to express their opinion and be courteously heard.
I am a woman, who has been married. Besides the fact that I feel very strongly that why men cheat is not couched in all the bs we attribute to it to make women feel better, and will never think anything differently because I believe in evolutionary psychology and biology, the fact that the mistress and the prostitute (such dirty words for dirty women, according to the conditioned average woman!) were treated so disrespectfully is unacceptable. The fact is, many women spreads their legs for rent and dinner without hesitation, hate to bust your puritanical bubble, but at least the legal prostitute has a more lucrative business model.
I'm disappointed Anderson let the show devolve in such a pedestrian fashion.
Here is my take on this afternoon's show. Bethany (paid prostitute) is getting older and her plastic surgery is wearing off so now she is on to a new career. A sex therapist. I mean really? She just realizes her days are numbered and needs to make money another way. Would one of her clients want her after being with probably 1,000 different men? Icky!!! As for the former mistress. You could tell that she also has been hurt by a man cheating. The mistress and the wife receive wounds and scarring. The fact remains that when two people agree before God to become one they must uphold the convenant made between them and God period. It's not just horrible filty men who cheat. It is not because the wife is lacking in any way. Most of the women men cheat with are usually uglier than their wives. They are the women who are lacking not the wife. Their self esteem must be really low to accept the crumbs given from a man. They can put on a good act of it like they are on top and the truely wanted woman but they aren't. How many men really leave their wife for the mistress anyway? I'm sure it is a small percentage. Another thing never get in your mind that the woman who stays with the cheating husband is weak. It takes more strength to stay and fix the problem instead of running and divorcing. Divorcing is as easy as getting your license. I am speaking from experience. I was once a mistress and then sent the gentleman back to his wife and family. He was separated at the time. It was the right thing to do. I have also been the wife who's husband cheated on her after just having our child. Well 6 months after. It took much therapy, prayer, and church family and the grace of God to get us through it. It took me 5 years to completely forgive and offer it up.The forgiveness was for me to heal. I was an independent woman with much self esteem. When this happened I felt horrible as if it was my fault somehow. It took my husband over a year to answer the question why? Finally he said because she was their and he thought he could get away with it. It had nothing to do with me. We had a great sex life and a wonderful family. This person was in his training class for 6 weeks away from home and staying in a hotel room. I also found out that she has Borderline personality disorder. Boy did he dodge a bullet. She was crazy. My first thought was to leave; isn't that what we are told? If they cheat you leave or you will lose yourself. All my family members and my children and friends wanted me to leave and the bible said I could leave so why did I stay? I love him and knew that we could make it through. Believe me he had a rough couple of years from me. I remember thinking Hillary Clinton was an idiot until it happened to me then I saw her strength. As for who gets blamed? Both parties involved in the cheating not the faithful spouse. Peace Out
I have a problem with blaming the women (the sex workers). This is the type of things that always happen with females. I have been married for 28 years and if my husband cheats. It is his problem and no one else. I will not try to understand his problem and I will not forgive. He better keep walking and he knows that. We could go out and cheat but we do not, we made a commitment for better or worse. Women stop blaming each other. Put the blame where it belong THE MAN ONLY and if he cannot stay true with his marriage, do you really want to be married to someone like that, someone that you will never trust again.
Why the wives keep blaming other women for their husband's mistakes? It's like blaming the grocery store owner for your obesity! If you want to keep your weight down, buy less food and exercise, but don't blame others for your problems!
If you husband cheats, it is not the prostitutes' fault! It is his! HE betrayed you, HE cheated on you and not the prostitute!!! People should learn to take responsibilities for their actions and stop blaming others! C'mon, people, grow up and face the reality!
The "Cheat proof tips" for 1 are b.s. I did them with my ex to the T and if he wants to cheat he will that's all there is to it. As far as the prostitutes are concerned they are doing their own thing. If you don't keep your kitchen filled with groceries, don't blame McDonalds for making your husband fat, it is the same concept with prostitutes, do not blame them for what you do or do not do with your husband. It was also your husband's choice to go to one they don't hunt down all the married men to ruin families, pull your heads out of your asses and take some responsibility.
When the women in the audiance were asked if any of them where prostitutes, they all denied it. They all lied, Because I will bet that at one time or another they with held sex for one reason or another, and that is a form of prostitution. " I will give you a romp in the sack IF I can do this or have that." That is the same as getting paid for it. I would much rather have my husband go to a clean prostitute, than some dirty bitch on the street. Oh by the way I am 65 years old,and think humans are the most selfish animals on earth, most only think about themselves. And will cheat, and lie, to get there way.