The Rudest Behaviors Ever! Anderson Investigates...
Monday, April 30, 2012 5:18PM
Rule number one: If you are experiencing bad restaurant service, never mess with a waiter until you’ve gotten your food, says former waiter and best-selling author Steve Dublanica who wrote “Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip--Confessions of a Cynical Waiter (P.S.)”
Even though you’re angry, Steve says to never deal with the waiter -- deal with the manager.
“If you have encountered rude service, says Steve, “vote with your feet... don’t go back there.”
“Anderson” and Yahoo! Shine teamed up to ask our online audiences the rudest behavior they continually encounter. Yahoo! Shine Facebook friends were quick to respond with passionate rude rants.
Shannon P. said on Facebook, “Being MOWED down at clothing rack by a rude/entitled shopper who has abs NO concept of personal space!” Amanda S. posted, “When you’re in line at the store and the person is so close to you that you can feel him breathin on your neck!!”
While responses varied, one of the top rants was rude cell phone behavior.
In a poll asking, “What rude behavior bothers you most?” 56% of respondents said parents who do not supervise their children are most annoying. Ten percent said rude waiters, 8% said pet owners who do not clean up after their dogs and 7% said tardiness.
One of the top rude behaviors came in at 19% -- people who talk too loudly on their cell phones.
Anderson Cooper says his number on pet peeve is rudeness. Arrogant people being rude to other people, cutting in line, talking loudly on their cell phones and being rude to waiters, makes him very angry.
As part of Tuesday’s episode, “Anderson Investigates Rudeness,” we decided to do a series of hidden camera investigations to see how people react when someone is being rude to then. We hired an actor to be rude all day and the results were amazing.
Would you approach someone being rude in public? Surprisingly, not many people did...
Amy Alkon, syndicated advice columnist and author of “I See Rude People,” says that “when someone is on a cell phone in a public place, they are hijacking your thoughts, they’re stealing your time and your peace of mind.”
Anderson agreed, saying, “That’s the thing that annoys me is that they are stealing my time, and my brainpower is focused on them -- when it should be focused on the inane things that I think about through the day or whatever I want to think about.”
Do you silently sit there and fume while someone is rude? Amy says it amplifies things. “You’re eating you that way and it can have very negative effects on your health. So it’s really important to not do that, to not brew. But to say something before you brew so much that you explode.”
Amy suggests that if you absolutely have to get on your cell phone in a public place, a person must take their conversation outside, or whisper, with hand over mouth.
Where do you encounter the rudest people? On Yahoo Shine, 32% said they encounter the most rudeness at retail store. Tying for the second rudest places were grocery stores and airport/airplanes. Rounding out the list was 14% at restaurants/coffee shops and 4% at the gym.
Have you experienced a rude waiter? Take a look at what happened when we set up our actor, Mac, to pose as an extremely obnoxious and rude waiter.
Even though you’re angry, Steve says to never deal with the waiter -- deal with the manager.
“If you have encountered rude service, says Steve, “vote with your feet... don’t go back there.”
“Anderson” and Yahoo! Shine teamed up to ask our online audiences the rudest behavior they continually encounter. Yahoo! Shine Facebook friends were quick to respond with passionate rude rants.
Shannon P. said on Facebook, “Being MOWED down at clothing rack by a rude/entitled shopper who has abs NO concept of personal space!” Amanda S. posted, “When you’re in line at the store and the person is so close to you that you can feel him breathin on your neck!!”
While responses varied, one of the top rants was rude cell phone behavior.
In a poll asking, “What rude behavior bothers you most?” 56% of respondents said parents who do not supervise their children are most annoying. Ten percent said rude waiters, 8% said pet owners who do not clean up after their dogs and 7% said tardiness.
One of the top rude behaviors came in at 19% -- people who talk too loudly on their cell phones.
Anderson Cooper says his number on pet peeve is rudeness. Arrogant people being rude to other people, cutting in line, talking loudly on their cell phones and being rude to waiters, makes him very angry.
As part of Tuesday’s episode, “Anderson Investigates Rudeness,” we decided to do a series of hidden camera investigations to see how people react when someone is being rude to then. We hired an actor to be rude all day and the results were amazing.
Would you approach someone being rude in public? Surprisingly, not many people did...
Amy Alkon, syndicated advice columnist and author of “I See Rude People,” says that “when someone is on a cell phone in a public place, they are hijacking your thoughts, they’re stealing your time and your peace of mind.”
Anderson agreed, saying, “That’s the thing that annoys me is that they are stealing my time, and my brainpower is focused on them -- when it should be focused on the inane things that I think about through the day or whatever I want to think about.”
Do you silently sit there and fume while someone is rude? Amy says it amplifies things. “You’re eating you that way and it can have very negative effects on your health. So it’s really important to not do that, to not brew. But to say something before you brew so much that you explode.”
Amy suggests that if you absolutely have to get on your cell phone in a public place, a person must take their conversation outside, or whisper, with hand over mouth.
Where do you encounter the rudest people? On Yahoo Shine, 32% said they encounter the most rudeness at retail store. Tying for the second rudest places were grocery stores and airport/airplanes. Rounding out the list was 14% at restaurants/coffee shops and 4% at the gym.
Have you experienced a rude waiter? Take a look at what happened when we set up our actor, Mac, to pose as an extremely obnoxious and rude waiter.
Filed Under: As Seen On The Show
Comments
"Great peace have they which love thy law: and nothing shall offend them." Psalms 119:165
"Great peace have they which love thy law: and nothing shall offend them." Psalms 119:165
What about patrons who are rude to restaurant staff? I work at a restaurant as a busser and see how rude, FOR NO REASON, guests can be just because they think they are some special gift to the world and act like the server is below them. As well as treating hostess' wrong because they cant' sit in a closed area. Restaurant staff are people too, so dont act like they are servants, they are trying to make a living like anyone else.
The amazing thing in all of these conversations is that too many people think they are 100% polite and correct while it is everyone else who is the problem. Take a look at yourself and realize you are a problem. Don't go out asking for fourteen changes to your meal - this is not your home! Some adjustment is fine, but by the very demand of the majority the food has been modified to fit the profile for many. Also stop exaggerating about the problem(s) - the earth didn't stop! If it is so bad - pay for what you have and leave! This is truly the correct and mannerly thing to do in these situations. There is nothing so exclusive anymore that you have to sit it out and take whatever is happening that is offending you and evidently no one else. It most of these situations the complainer is the only one in a snit. Others are either dealing with it and don't find it so difficult.
The problem with presenting it in this form is that we are not addressing customer/guest behavior. Which is many times just as horrible if not worse!
As a professional Chef, with 30 years of service under the belt, I thought I had heard it all, until today, when Springs1 spouted her snarling drivel, including the 39 points of service list that obviously took her a lot of time to post. I think Katie hit the nail on the head, and I wish I had the opportunity to work with her. I assure you, I have met and worked with hundreds of different waitpersons, very rarely does one not make the cut, and has to be removed. Occasionally there are those that think they can make more money, stealing from management, but greed always is outweighed by the truths, and eventually they will slip up. But, to call waitpersons as a whole out, and chastise them for the inabilities to please what appears to be a very unpleasant person, is ridiculous. You should stay at home, and never visit any place where you can ruin someone elses day again, Springs1....just some sound advice.
That rude waiter experiment is so far removed from reality. You people do not have a clue. I am a server and will get a complaint once in a while, usually about not being able to keep up with a camal ( someone who drinks a gallon of fluids in an hour)( do they have a portapotty under their seat?) I mean come on!! you all should have to get off of your fat ---- and wait on a busy section for an hour! I guarentee you will be in tears!! So stop your wining and complaining and learn some friggin manners!! The world does not revolve around you!
o.k., lets define what bad service is so you people do not walk in to a restaraunt on a high horse ready to pounce on your poor server. 1# you should be greeted in two minutes( Not have your order Taken, just a hello) 2# drinks dropped within 5 minutes, than order taken or app. order taken. 3# salead or app within 8 mins.#4 Total entree time !0-15 mins.Your server should be freindly and and should offer a few suggestions.#5 After entree dropped checked back on in two minutes.#6 drink refills offered. #7 plates pulled. #8 dessert suggestions or after dinner drinks.#9 check dropped. #10 cash out customer allways thanking them and ask them to come back. These are the basic steps for good service. Please note to customer that when you times those steps times 25 in your servers section you might not get an instant refill on your 5th cola. I have been a server for 30 years and I have noticed a lot more complaining about an empty water glass or that i could not refill a soda every two minutes. If your service is falling within these guide lines ( give or take a couple of minutes) DO NOT COMPLAIN TO A MANAGER!!! just try to sit back and enjoy yourself and not obsess over your servers every move for gods sake!! A sit down restaraunt is NOT A DRIVE UP WINDOW!!! Some of you people are so mean!! Do you really want to be the half of the one percent of people( allmost allways female) that runs up to the front desk wining to the poor manager (that beleive me does not want to see your wining face)? GET A LIFE!!! if you are not happy just tip alittle less( not a lot please) and dont worry about your food, we servers have ethics ( beleive it or not) and we DO NOT MESS WITH YOUR FOOD!!) I think most of us would rather dump a water glass over your snivelling head than do something to your food! Now if you have an imature server who in innappropriate or just can not get the timing steps down than you could mention to a manager that you think your server is too busy and could use some help. But do not run to the front desk and bitch about your server that you can clearly see is running and smiling and sweating!!!
Springs1...your last sentence really summed up your whole nearly pointless rant...you catch more flies with honey, and you obviously are carrying a very big bottle of vinegar around. If you truly had an experience THAT bad, you should have just informed the Manager that you were leaving, not paying, and continued onward to somewhere that would meet your needs. Sounds to me, that you were upset about an entirely different problem, and you let it ruin your night...hope you are sleeping better after getting this person removed from the payroll, I'd love to hear her side of the story.
Springs1
Although you never answered me as to what your education and your current position is, your serving experience is very limited and I am unable to judge your serving abilities.
Please don't project your insecurities onto others. I am not in a contest with you. If you have worked over 19 hours and 'understand', then you, of all people, should be more understanding of people in these positions.
You are right, side work does not get you a tip, but it does keep the restaurant running. If no one did side work, then the restaurant service would halt. I have worked for many restaurants in the past, fine dining, sports bars, small bars, corporate restaurants, and in more then one, the server staff was responsible for tasks that were considered 'kitchen tasks', like making ranch, cutting those lemons you don't like and in one, prepping salads.
Although I haven't spoken to you in person, I can tell that between your eating disorder, your need to control the things and people around you, your lack of attention to detail and by using your own descriptions of your behavior and the tone that you convey by using CAPS to set certain words out, your choice of words and your inability to properly capitalize, punctuate and spell words in your responses; you quite certainly have an attachment disorder and possess certain personality traits that cause you to feel like, by using the internet you can fill those voids that are left in your life.
Although I do not understand you, nor do I currently care for you, I do hope and pray that you get the help and understanding wisdom you require from a licensed professional.
I also hope that with all of this undue and unnecessary banter online, you are able to get a more clear view of the world around you, as it relates to dining out. You might find that if you are less judgmental of those waiting on you and more open to the rules that these people have placed upon them by their management, that you might have a more agreeable time out. And that the staff is not out to 'ruin' your night out. Many of your numbered complains from an earlier post may be irritating to you, but are required by their corporate office for them to keep their job.
Ps. Are you sure your aren't Canadian??
Waiter and waitress work is probably one of the toughest jobs you can do...every customer is a new adventure...sure there are bad servers but there are bad employees in any field...the majority of servers are hard working people who know well how to treat people with the utmost respect...I have been a waiter, bartender, Maitre'D and banquet manager for over fifty years...I will guarantee you that there are 100 rude and ignorant customers to one bad server.
On the sales side: watching cheap-ass scammers who tear something apart in your store and demand a discount because the package is damaged.
On the customer side: counter staff expecting you to stuff the tip jar because they took your order (as opposed to waitstaff that actually supplies service).
Springs1 - Have you considered medication?
Re: You're margarita - good chance your dinner partner picked it up himself, quaffed it, ordered a double & did the same again before returning to what was undoubtably your "pleasant" discourse.
Well, what happens if the Manager is rude? A friend and I were asked to leave the table by a Manager, while I was still drinking my coffee, because we had paid the bill and she said the table was reserved for someone else! There was no reserve sign on the table, and it was empty when we got to the restaurant, and we weren't there that long anyway. It was unbelievable. I told her her behavior was outrageous and she continued to ask us to leave. A letter to the owner was never responded to.
Hey Springs1... you know what my main pet peeve is?
People that post things on the internet and waste my time restating the same things over & over just rewording it so they can get a sense of importance by talking a lot & saying very little.
ie...
*servers that don't write orders the way you want them to
*servers that don't write orders the correct way
*servers that don't write the entire orders
*servers that write the order down wrong
*etc...
*etc...
(sound familiar?)
Springs1, do yourself and the entire world a favor, never eat in public again. In fact just stay home & do your own cooking and enjoy the same tip you surely give servers when you do go out (and set whoever you bully there free before they wind up in a mental institution or the hospital).
Oh, and don't forget your pen and paper... don't wanna forget to write down what you want for dinner.
Springs 1: I live and work as a server in Louisiana. In Lake Charles as a matter of fact. I make really good money as it while I go to school and I have customers that come in and request me. I take it by your attitude that you are the type of customer that servers don't want to wait on because you come in with an attitude that you are better than everyone and I am the queen and such. There are rules that servers have to follow and maybe your expectations are a bit extreme. The greetings for most places are pretty standard, taking a glass when it is empty is usually to place it in the dish tube in the back to be washed and bringing you a new one it also helps with prebussing when we do this. Bringing a pitcher of tea and water to the table is pretty standard everywhere in the world. What do you do for a living? I see how you have stalked this blog pretty well for over an hour today alone. Does that mean that your husband goes to work and pays the bills while you sit on your butt? You would do go to remember that most servers are only there while they are studying or going to school and one day they will have skills that you will need and that server is going to remember you and refuse to help you. Also a piece of advice: most servers know and talk to other servers in other establishments and once they figure out who you are they will put you on blast with all your info on facebook, blogs, newspapers and such and you will get sorry services from most places. Hard for a manager to fire a single server if every other server says the same thing about you. I am going to enjoy the rest of my day off from work, school, kids, and housework and go get some great service for my lunch.