The Day Carter Died: Thinking About It All the Time
Friday, January 06, 2012 1:24PM
Today on the show, Anderson’s mom, Gloria Vanderbilt, speaks openly about the day her son Carter died. He was 23 and jumped off the balcony of their New York home.
It’s a day Gloria thinks about every day, explaining, “You never ever get over it, but you learn to live with it.”
In this emotional clip, Gloria says to Anderson, “There was a moment when I thought I was going to jump after him, but then I thought of you... and it stopped me from doing that.
It’s a day Gloria thinks about every day, explaining, “You never ever get over it, but you learn to live with it.”
In this emotional clip, Gloria says to Anderson, “There was a moment when I thought I was going to jump after him, but then I thought of you... and it stopped me from doing that.
Filed Under: As Seen On The Show
Comments
I understand what Anderson and his mom feel about the word closure,there just never seems to be any,I lost my boyfriend in a car accident which happened right in front of me,I swear I saw him in my house the next day after he died,who knows,only God and him know if it was real but there's never closure,you just simply learn to live with it like it was yesterday.The pain never leaves your heart even when you've tried to move on,I can identify with them and will continue to pray for them to gain some sort of peace.
I remain touched by your episode about your brother who committed suicide. I too, had a brother who committed suicide and I am trying to investigate the circumstances surrounding his death.He passed away, July 12, 1972.I was 13,and he was 30.I went to summer camp that year and when I returned home, I knew something was terribly wrong.I was told my brother had been in an accident and had died. After that, he was never mentioned again.
In 1981,I was at a party, and another guest said,“Your name sounds familiar to me”,the host interrupted,“Her brother was the one that was in all the papers the summer before we started at UofF. He committed suicide”!
In later years,I asked my Mom about the circumstances surrounding his death.The short answer was my Father didn’t approve of his getting his Doctorate of Philosophy.Of course, that never made sense to me.
My Mom passed in2004. As I struggled, with no family to embrace me in my grief, I went to grief counseling. My brother was included in that counsel. Iwasasked,“Do you think your brother was Gay”? “I don’t know, but if he was, maybe he had a partner that could give me insight into his life”.
What I know or overheard in whispered conversation:
• PrepSchoolatUniversitySchoolinShakerHeights Ohio;1959
• HisbestfriendatUniversitySchoolwasDanRoberts
• Vanderbilt for hisUndergrad
• ReceivedDoctorateinPhilosophy from Uof F
• Some kind of connection to HughHefner
If you could help me find the truth of my brother’s life, I would be so very grateful.
Dear Judy,
I am you 25 years ago. please Judy dear reach out, I did and have been so happy , wish I had done it sooner.
Dear Anderson Cooper and Miss Gloria Vanderbilt, I have read your books , found you to be so strong for yourself, your children and your friends and family. You are my HERO.
The relationship you have with Anderson is a wonderful legacy. My children are also boys...GOD BLESS YOU BOTH.
Dear Anderson: I love your show and your Mom is so funny. I have watched your show for years. I never got to know my Mom. I am 62 yrs. old and I mourn the loss of being of not knowing my family. I did live with 14 other families, life wasn't great but I had a interesting upbring. I did finally marry at 25 and have 2 daughters and my son passed away after birth. I have 4 grand-children and feel blessed. My girls love your show and my little grandchildren know you too. You are in many living rooms every day among many kinds of people. For many years I have carried a picture from your Mother's collection. I'm sorry you lost your Dad and brother too soon. You an your Mom are loved by many. I watched you again this NEW YEARS Eve. Anderson you have worked hard all your life and I respect that. You have taught me so much.
I wanted to somment on your show to-day. Your Mom is a lovely and talented woman. I never got to call any one Mom, but I was called Mom and I respect the meaning of that word.
Keep up the great work. Would love to come to one of your shows.
Why dwell, my brother committed suicide in 1995, by a single bullet to his head..I don't let myself think about this. It is only hurtful. You deal with the loss and move on...Dwelling is not good for you, causes more harm than good...Carter apparently was hurting in a way no one could help, not even his mother...my brother killed himself at my mother's house. Maybe they just wanted to be by their mom's when they decide to die....we will never know until we are in heaven and they tell us why....
Having only recently watched this episode, I was struck by the absolutely heartwarming interation between you and your mom. It is that innate kindness that makes your shows a joy to watch, and it's easy to see that the tree didn't grow far from the apple.
Watched your show with your Mom in regards to the family deaths you had...and your guests. Particularly the last guest...he lost his wife, daughter, mom than dad at different times but seemed pretty upset yet. I lost a brother and sister in car accidents ALMOST 1 yr apart of each other--it was 4 days short of the 1-yr anniversary of my brother that I lost my sister. It will be 32 and 31 yrs come Sept. 26 & 24. And it is true what your Mom said "you never get over it, you learn to live with it". And what I learned from the many deaths/funerals I've attended?....
My sister died. It was sudden and from natural causes. She was only 31 when it happened. She was the closest person to me in the world and it turned my life upside down. I feel for you and your mother. I understand how a death of a child, no matter what age, changes a parent. I saw my Mom and Dad go through it all as well. I know as a sibling it is something which changed the person you are completely. Time does make it easier to cope and go on, but there is not a day that goes by without you thinking about it. My sister lay down for a nap and never woke up. Things like that are just not suppose to happen. God Bless you and your family.
Very much enjoy your show every day. Your Mother is a delight.
The way she and you handled your brothers death gives me,and i
am sure, many more people the feeling we can make it also. The last few years have brought much heartache, but I will make it.
As I watched this video I think of my grandparents. Also my cousin Gayle who died at age 25 and my nephew Larry who died at age 12. These two people were so young and had great futures ahead of them. Both deaths are a mystery to all of us.
Anderson, I feel for you and your mom. Time doesn't necessarily heal but it dulls the pain. You both will always be in my prayers.
I love your new talk show and AC 360.... You are a wonderful person and hope there are many many more exciting things coming your way.
You sick, twisted peter pumper. If my Mother found out I was a fa**ot, she would dragged my ass outside and stomped me into reality, or at least till I gave up smokin' pole. Always knew there was something "queer" about you!
You are just one of countless millions of peter pumpers headed for hell. Now convince everyone you were born a ***got. How any of you homos can actually believe that smokin' pole is ok or exceptable is lunacy. The same for you female carpet munchers. Come judgement day, your collective asses will be tossed into eternal fire. Doesnt matter if you believe it or not. Its a fact. No different than the fool that doesnt buy into "gravity", then steps off a bridge or an airplane in flight. Because he didnt believe it kept him alive? NOT!! Always knew there was something "queer" about you.
Anderson, am so elated that you invited your mom over and God bless her for those sacrifices. We only have one mom in the world and if you can, provide her with all the love and attention she needs. My mom passed away 2 years ago; she was diagnosed with kidney problem in 2002 and the doctor told us only 10% of the kidney works and prepare ourselves for the inevitable as she got 3 years to live. I never let a day passed without either saying to her I love her or doing little things that make her happy. Thank God we had a 5 year bonus for having her despite the doctor's prediction.
Glad you came out in your own time Anderson. It is no one's business but your's and the ones who are close to you and whom you love. I understand you not doing it before because some people will make it about what you are and not who you are. You are a really great reporter - love the keeping them honest segments on AC360... and really love it when someone does not answer a question and you go back and ask it again and again and don't let them off the hook because they want to skirt the truth or answering the question. Also really enjoy the new talk show - you've had some great guests and I too am fascinated by the relationship between Kathy Griffin and your mother - though I think Kathy is probably a lot less outrageous in real life when she is not on camera. Keep up the great work and block out the negative remarks.
Dear Mr. Cooper - that seems formal - I am a Canadian and I try to be polite.
I am so proud of you and happy for you that you have 'come out'. I knew you were gay a long time ago. Not because you were ever outwardly 'gay' - but that you have such a strong character, great intelligence - and a very handsome man - I also know if you were straight you would definitely have women throwing themselves at you.
I certainly respect your privacy and know that some 'lucky man' will have the love of his life with you (and already might have).
I love your show and watch it regularly. I have had 5 surgeries, been hospitalized 9 times and survived heart failure in the past three years. I unfortunately have been off work as much as 'working' - so I have had more time to watch you. Thank you for your hard work on Anderson 360... and for being so 'genuine and real' on Anderson.
You inspire me.
God bless you
Theresa